From the Why-do-I-even-bother-with-these-fools Dept. Since the beginning of the week, several partners emailed me to ask if I’d seen a posting by some marketing dude over at the usual suspects. Lately they’ve been vying so hard for my attention, that it 
would be a shame not to humor our regular readers with a proper rebuttal – especially when one can pull the pants of said stuffed marketing suit in one swift article. Gareth, I don’t know who you are mate, and I frankly couldn’t care less. But you gave me a total Jon Stewart Moment when I read your article. So, sit back, take a deep breath and enjoy…
So let’s get this mess straightened out: According to our boy Gareth Kitson on his blog here, I am supposed to have copied the design for the RESguru top banner from his company AppSense, and I quote; “the below graphic is what was created for [...] Strata in mid-2009“. End quote. That they created their own so far unexplained eyesore on www.whatisstrata.com in mid 2009 is probably true. The funny thing is that the page after 2½ years at present, still doesn’t tell you a darn thing! It’s just a lame logo! I’m however glad that Gareth is relatively precise about the time AppSense made it. While I do appreciate your reasoning that there’s no reason to let the truth get in the way of a good story, I hope you don’t mind me asking dear Gareth: How exactly did that happen, when RESguru.com went live in the beginning of that year? What’s that? You require evidence? Okay:
- Exhibit A: RESguru.com domain reg. Dec 16th 2008
- Exhibit B: First article posted. Jan 3rd 2009.
- Exhibit C: Date of creation for our Histats counter. Jan 21st 2009.
Gareth, sorry it took a little while to get back to you, as I’m quite busy these days taking business from you. I can hardly wait however for you to apply your stunning marketing powers of logical deduction to explain this temporal paradox. If it involves a Flux Capacitor and a Delorean, I’m all ears. However, in the meantime allow me to assist: You just got yourself caught red-handed in a blatant lie! Are we to believe anything else you have to say? I sincerely doubt that.
In regards to the graphics, in case anyone should still be vaguely interested, the RESguru banner was just a free stock WordPress theme. Gareth, may I suggest you go whine at the creators at BlogChemistry instead if you don’t like it. When RES changed their corp colors, I just recolored the banner to match. We got over the blues and whites a while back, ya know. Speaking of whites, the cold wet sensation you’re feeling sliding down the side of your face right now, may likely be of poultry origin.
By the way, I couldn’t help notice all comments previously posted over on your article have disappeared, except for the obvious kissass. Did someone say something you didn’t like Gareth? Well don’t worry about it matey, because RESguru’s comments section below is always open for business, even for you and Appdetec…, sorry – I meant Harry. Oh, by the way – just in case your posted article should happen to get mysteriously redacted or even completely vanish, I’ve taken the liberty to save a nice PDF copy of the original it, just for the lulz of our readers.
I’m sure that as we speak, you and Harry are probably are refueling your little Fudmobile, angling for another round of sissyslapping. Rest assured, while I’d love to smack you both into the floorboards over and over again (figuratively speaking of course), for all the crap you spread about my employer and the other vendors – I don’t have time for that right now. Moan all you want, but I’ve said my piece. I’ve got loads of partners to train who are fed up with your lies, so adios chicas.
Update Dec 16th: Okay, okay…so I couldn’t resist the opportunity to fire another salvo in the general direction of these posers, just for the fun of it. Speaking of fun: Here’s a little xmas present from all of RESguru to all of you. Click on the package here on the right to download. Merry Xmas! Ho ho ho!